Thursday, December 20, 2012

My Almost 7 Month Update

I have lost 117 lbs and am wearing size 16 jeans and XL tops.  I can fit into 14s but I'm melted and poured right now.  My shoe size is now a 9.5.  On a daily basis, I mostly eat protein foods and can count on my fingers in 8 months how often I've had bread or flour based products.  I drink orange juice or skim milk daily.  The only sweets have once in a while is dark chocolate with a spoon of peanut butter. 

I have a lot of excess skin now on my stomach but it to be expected with 6 tummy surgeries and a lot of fat gone, hopefully 2014 will be my big plastic surgery year.  You are supposed to wait 6 months after your goal weight to get plastics done but it will be about 12K so I have to pay off my VSG surgery first.  My original goal weight was 170 but being at 193 I'm not happy with my upper arm, thigh, or stomach size so I have reset my 2nd goal weight to 155 lbs.  That will be half of my original size. 

Here are some updated pics.  First was taken in October and second was early December.

Monday, October 1, 2012

4 month surgerversary updates

It's been awhile since my last updates.  I'm still having hair loss, but less than I was.  I am currently wearing a pair of Catos size 16 jeans.  I've thought about either wearing my jeans inside out so everyone can see my tag or announcing it randomly to strangers.  My new favorite snack recipe is eggface protein truffles with Click mocha protein, very brownieish tasting.  I have also had 1 spoon of dark chocolate chips with 8 oz skim milk as a snack and 3/4 a coffee cup of grapes, both of which have no protein but satisfy my evil sweet tooth.  I take pole dance class once a week and zumba class three times a week.  On zumba gym days I also bike 1 to 3 miles or do a little arm strength training if I get to the gym early enough.

 Here are my monthly losses.  I've really slowed down in September but I went from a 20 to a 16 so not all terrible.  I've had more stalls and more slower loss.  
 May 27.6 (inc pre-op), June 17.4lbs, July 15.2lbs, August 17.2lbs, Sept 9.2 lbs

Updated pics of me yesterday in an XL shirt and 16W jeans:


Wednesday, September 19, 2012

84 lbs Down & Pixie Dust

I have lost :::drum roll:: 84 lbs.  My updated goal is to be down 110 lbs by Halloween.  I found the perfect Halloween costume yesterday at Goodwill.  It is a size 18 Avenue dress brand new for $5.  Guess what I'm going to be?  Tinkerbell!  Yep, a size 18 dress fit me perfect so it should be roomy by Halloween.  Just gotta add wings, a wand, and some pixie dust.  I wanted to wear one of those cutesy short costumes but my thighs aren't ready for that yet.  I also got my hair cut short so I would shed less.  It looks goofy in both pics because I don't know how to fix it yet, but here ya go:

Monday, September 10, 2012

No Sugar Added Crockpot Fruit Butter- Greek Yogurt Add-In

Apple butter
1 crockpot full of peeled sliced apples
2 tsp cinnmaon
1 tube 100% apple juice
1/2 tsp ground cloves
1/2 tsp ground allspice
3 tbsp honey

Pumpkin butter
2 cans pumpkin puree
3 tbsp pumpkin pie spice
1 tbsp cinnamon
1 cup 100% apple juice
3 tbsp honey
3 squirts of sugar free pancake syrup

Blueberry butter
1 bag frozen blueberries
1/2 pkg strawberries
3/4 cup 100% apple juice
4 tbsp vanilla infused honey w/ vanilla bean

I made these 3 as experiments this week.  All of them made the house smell A-MAY-ZING, but the best flavor goes to the apple butter.   The apple could also be made with jarred unsweetened applesauce but I have a handy dandy apple peeler/ corer so it didn't add much prep time.  Cut crockpot on low, add all ingredients,  put butter knives across the top of your crockpot and set the lid ajar so the moisture can escape.  Cook for 6-12 hours until your butter gets thick and rich.  The apple & pumpkin will get darker.  On the apple and blueberry, I used my immersion stick blender in the crockpot to blend until smooth.  The apple and pumpkin made 3 jelly jars each and the blueberry made 2 jelly jars.  They keep in the fridge for 2-3 months.  I'm using them as additions to my daily greek yogurt.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Goofy Real Pics of Me- 300+ lbs (Before)

 January 2011- Ice Skating or attempting it anyways
 September 2011 family pic- this is published no where but here.  I look like I have an intertube around my belly
 October 2011- I'm the Kia Hamstar with a double chin. 

April 2012- birthday party.  This is my heaviest pic

Stalling & Greek Yogurt

Friday was my 14 week surgerversary.  We went to the rodeo and cosmic bowling with my sister and her boyfriend.  I had 2 mixed drinks and 6 pickle chips, all in moderation right?  I gained 2.2 lbs.  Those pounds stuck to me Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and now Wednesday.  A freaking gain then a 5 day stall.  I'm losing more in my waist and thighs, wishing the loss would start in my upper arms and belly.   My boobs are also deflating, same cup size, but def in need of plastic surgery with my tummy.  I'm still in a size 20 though I have a closet of 18s just waiting on my stall to break.

Today I had Fage greek yogurt with strawberries for breakfast, Fage greek yogurt with sugar free cinnamon apples for snack, and 4 oz of monterey chicken with 2 bites of refried beans and salsa for lunch.  Supper will be...more greek yogurt.  I've read about the 2 day greek yogurt diet to break a stall so I'm trying it out.  It's 4 oz of yogurt every 3 hours, like 5 servings per day with up to 2 cups of fruit and plenty of water, that's all.   I had a preplanned lunch meeting at one of my favorite restaurants so I modified it.  Anyways, here are two doctored up greek yogurt recipes if you want to try them.  I don't like greek yogurt, but I'd choose the apple cinnamon one as having more flavor. 

Strawberry Berry Yogurt
3 oz Fage 0% greek yogurt
2 sliced strawberries
1 tsp sugar free berry jam
splash Torani sugar free vanilla- to taste
Mix well

Apple Cinnamon Yogurt 
3 oz Fage 0% greek yogurt
tsp cinnamon
splash Torani sugar free vanilla- to taste
Mix well and top with apple mix to the top of your 4 oz container
(Apple Mix- diced apples, sugar free pancake syrup, cinnamon, dash of vanilla- mix & cook on medium until apples tender- refrigerate)

Me and my sister at the rodeo

Cosmic bowling- rosy red cheeks equals yummy drinks!
Labor Day cookout at mamas~check out the healthy grub.  So good!  I didn't lose eating this either, crazy!

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

3 Month Update

So, Saturday made 3 months since I had my sleeve.  I've lost 76.8 lbs total and 51.8 lbs post-op.   So far, chicken is my best restriction food.  I feel fuller eating it than anything else so I try to eat it frequently.   An average day in my belly is a fried egg (no oil/butter) for breakfast, a protein bar or jerky for lunch, and some grilled chicken and a couple bites of veggies for supper. I usually have milk at night to up my protein uptake.  I still struggle to try and drink 64 oz of water daily. 

Exercise wise, I've upped the anty.  Two days ago I took a pole dancing class and will continue with weekly or bi-weekly lessons.  My arms most def got a workout, I can still feel it 2 days later.  I got a 5 & 10 lb weight from Wally World to try to start strengthening my arms.  They are way too flabby.  I also have an exercise ball to working out with.  I have began to walk 5 miles, but need to get into the routine daily. 

Hair.  What to say.  I shed more than my cats.  It's crazy.  I can run my fingers through my hair and have enough to make a little hair doll, so gross.  Little blonde hairs follow me everywhere.  I bought some Nioxin shampoo from a salon for $24 and some biotin, so hoping it works before I go bald, lol. 

I am in a solid size 20, down from a tight 24/26.  They are getting roomy in my hips so I'm ready to drop down to an 18.  I have a whole wardrobe of 16/18s which was generously provided by my stylish cousin.  Below is my comparison pics- tiny but you can see a huge difference (pun intended).

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Beach bound

I went to the beach from Friday to Monday.  I had 2 small slices total of Ultimate California pizza with wheat crust, pesto, chicken, artichokes, spinach, sun dried tomatoes, and feta cheese (it's tradition, yum), 2 small servings of frozen non-fat or fat free yogurt with fresh berries, coconut, and nuts, one Bahama Mama, and one Lifesaver mixed drink as my cheats over the course of 4 days.  We stayed at an oceanfront resort with 17 pools, hot tubs, and lazy rivers so I did A LOT of swimming and walking on the beach.  I lost 2.8 pounds on vacation! Total weight loss- 64.2 lbs.  10 week post op loss 39.2lbs~average 3.92 lbs per week.

 size 22 cover up, swimsuit is a 22/24 top with a 3X bottom that is getting HUGE
 Face close up. 
This is a 3X top that literally is falling off me.  I like this shirt and tried to make it look like an off the shoulder deal.  Going to the can't wear pile.  See my tummy is getting much smaller :).

Sunday, July 29, 2012

60 pounds!

I finally finally FINALLY hit 60 pounds down.  This is the next day at work at 60.6 lbs.  My 22's are literally falling off my hips so I tried to find some 20's at the store today.  Walmart had no 20's capris.  I went to the thrift before work and found this Apt9 khaki capri's new with tags for $5!  They are very snug in the tummy area but fit fine everywhere else.  I was maybe 12-13 years ago since I fit in a size 18 so I'm wearing them ALL day today.  I have a few 18's in my closet but they are still too tight.  I am also wearing a new Wally World size 20 tee that fits great, down from a 3x or 26/28.  My hips and belly seem to be the slowest to SHRINK already.  Now back to your regularly scheduled programming :).

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

2 Month Surgerversary

Today is my 2 month surgerversary. HW 1st week of May 310. 5/25-285, 1 month post op 269.2, 2 month post op 253.2. ttl weight lost 56.8, post op 31.8. I just pulled a 12 hr shift and it's HOT, so pardon the hair. Starting size tight 24 or 26, today baggy 22s (pictured) or 20s. I've been stalling for a week again but I can tell the difference in my pics.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Skinny jeans whoop whoop

Today I'm down 56.8 lbs.  Yesterday I wore Old Navy skinny jeans in a size 20 and they were not tight on my stomach at all.  I bought them a few years ago as goal jeans and when I bought them they wouldn't even slide above my knees.  If I could lose more in my stomach and upper thigh area I would probably be another size down.  My bra size has went from a 44DDD with overhang to a 42DDD perfect fit. 

Saturday, July 14, 2012

I'm melting, I'm melting! (Photo Whoring)

This was me one week ago on Saturday with my girls, 261 I think.  I'm the big girl in the blue tee.

Facebook mirror pose this morning~ 257.6

Big difference in one week, huh?!

Thursday, July 12, 2012

50 Pounds Down & Fat Back

I've lost  an even 50 lbs this morning!  The scale has came so close.  261.2, 261.6, 261.2,'s such a tease.  50 lbs is 10 bags of sugar.  When you think about it, imagine strapping 10 bags of sugar and carrying it all day.  That would be a bitch.  I have 90 lbs to go to goal, so it's like I'm lugging 18 more bags of sugar around until then.  Ekkkk!!! 

Now that I've lost 50 lbs, size 22s fit comfortably or baggy, depending on the brand.  Today I am wearing Merona jeans from Tarjay that I couldn't squeeze my ass in last year.  I hope to find some 20s at the thrift or a yard sale to get ready for the next size down.  I have no loose skin yet (bonus!) but I do notice I have back fat.  It's on each side and I can pitch a whole handful with some to spare.   Under my arms I look like I have bat wings too.  Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun Bat Girl!  I know I need to lift weights for my arms but how in the world do you exercise back fat? 

Monday, June 25, 2012

Happy One Month Surgerversary to Me!

Well, today is my one month surgerversary.  I've lost 40.8 lbs total and 15.8 lbs since surgery.  I'm still yo-yo stalling for over a week now.  I lost .8 Saturday, gained .4 yesterday.  I'm been in a blah blah mood because I've been eating right, but I know it's the dreaded stall, and I can now fit back in a size 22 bottoms.  I have the sleeve of steel and can handle eating up to 4 oz of anything but those yucky protein drinks.  I made zucchini lasagna last night with tons of protein goodness.  I also went swimming for the first time since surgery Saturday for four hours.  The water felt awesome!  My stomach was like a little buoy floating in the water. 

So, where have I lost it?  My face, my lower arms, my lower butt, and my stomach.  Check out my pics to see a 2 month difference.
                                            Face shot~April 2012~ highest weight 310lbs
                                                    May 25, 2012~ 285lbs~ surgery date
                                              June 25, 2012~ 269.2 ~ 1 month post-op (same shirt)

Saturday, June 16, 2012

22 Days out, cheater cheater, cucumber eater, and the dreaded stall?

I've lost 43.2 lbs including pre-op.  I am 22 days out and starting to feel a normal level of energy.  I fall asleep about as soon as my head hits the pillow at night.  If I could have a recliner to work at all day it would be so much easier.  I have a little method at night.  I lay on my right side on a memory pillow and wedge one behind my back.  Feels perfect.  Three of five incisions are healed, red, and shiny.  The one under my boobs and below that one has one dissolvable stitch sticking out, so I'm putting band-aids on them and hoping they heal by next week so I can swim. 

I have tried to start getting proteins in and have successfully ate scrambled egg white, scrambled egg, boiled egg, cheese string, 2 oz Wendy's chili, taco bell refried beans, 1/2 oz protein bar, and a seeded peeled cucumber.  Yeah, I know cucumber has no protein but I was craving it and it was so good.  My favorite canned soup is currently Campbell's Harvest Orange Tomato Soup.  Three days and I couldn't finish a can.  It look me 3 meals to eat a small Wendy's chili.  I added a pack of reduced fat sour cream because of the 30 minutes of no drinking rule.  It takes away some of the spice.  I can eat 2-3 oz per meal but can take big sips of water.  I haven't made it to 64 oz yet though.  It has to be ice cold to get down.  The only thing I can't stomach is protein drinks.  I feel sick every time I drink one  and 8 oz takes me 4 hours. 

My willpower is much better than before surgery.  At work last week they brought in 3 pizzas one day and 4 dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts the next.  KK chocolate iced creme killed doughnuts are my kryptonite, I usually have 3.  I banned them from coming in the office and didn't even sneak and lick the tops of any.  Score!  Soon I have to start cooking again.  I know my kids are tired of freezer meals.  I've been avoiding the kitchen since it's the smell of food I like that seems to trigger my whiny vents. 

This week I had lost .4, .4, .2, gained 1.4, lost it, now I guess I'm stalling.  Hopefully it doesn't last long because I like those 1 lb a day drops.  I have lost in my face, waist, lower butt area, and lower arms.  My bottoms are fitting looser but I'm still in the same size.  My goal is to lose 10 more lbs by the end of the month.  Wish me luck!

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Week 1 Post-Op & Mexican Chicken Broth recipe

I had water, gatorade, jello and Mexican Chicken Broth.  What is Mexican Chicken Broth?  It is a tasty broth I tried to copy from some I tried in Mexico.

Saute 1 lb diced chicken breast & some diced onion with cumin and garlic powder in a little olive oil in a medium pot.  Add 2 containers low sodium chicken broth and bring to boil.  Cut to low, add 1 pkg taco/mexican dry rice, and put lid on.  Cook for 8-10 minutes until rice is done.  Add handful cilantro.  Done!  I sipped 3 oz of the broth at a time for 3 days and served hubby and mama Mexican Chicken & Rice. 

I haven't started exercising yet.  I worked Thursday and Friday at my desk job.  Saturday I went to yard sales and the farmers market (where I sampled some delicious goat cheese).  I came home and weeded my garden and staked all my plants.  I felt a little dizzy afterwards but I was bending over, standing up, bending over, well you get the idea. 

I'm having a really hard time drinking enough liquids.  I just get bloated full at 3 oz.  I was told yesterday I could start full liquids.  My daughter made me a 3oz protein shake with skim milk and 1/2 scoop of Unjury chocolate powder.  I had to lay down on my side 10 minutes for the pain to go away.  I drank 1/2 a can of V8 juice this morning and had no issues.  Hubby is gone to Wally World to get me some pudding, greek yogurt, and instant mashed potatoes, so we shall see how I handle those.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Last two days in TJ

I can't get onto VST to paste my first two posts so starting in the middle...

On to Monday (recovery day 3).  I stayed in the room most of the day resting and watching HBO.  Omar picked me up and I visited 2 patients in the hospital, Janett and Sandra and gossiped for a while. I have head hunger BAD so a lot of time was discussing months of menus.  I REALLY want an omelet with goat cheese and some buffalo chicken dip, maybe together.  It changes day to day.

   Omar took me to get a mani/pedi.  Dr. Kelly said he usually pays for patients pedis, and Omar paid for my nails.  He is a brave soul to hang out in a nail shop/salon with all women and even got his hair cut.  We went back to the hospital and one patient needed a fan so Omar and I went to the store and he bought a fan.  We assembled it (I did put in 4 screws...) .  I got back to hotel around 9pm.  Sweet stuff is tasting weird to me and I didn't like the hotel broth, very plain.  I tipped $1 for room service to bring me a big tub of ice for my drinks.  I felt 100% safe while in Tj.  I didn't leave the hotel without Omar or Cecy.  At the hotel you have to have a room key to press a floor in the elevator and your room has 3 locks.

On Tuesday, Omar picked me up and we visited the hospital.  I got to see a picture of my stomach.  It looked pink, bloated, and gross with some fat stuck to it.  Asta la vista belly!  I went with Dr. Kelly, Omar, and Dr. Kelly's son to a nice Chinese restaurant.  The broth was delicious though I could only drink 4 sips of beverage and maybe 3/4 inch of a teacup of broth before I felt that full feeling.  This pic is when I was finished eating.

We drove around Tijuana and I was shown different areas- industrial, residential, downtown.  I got some good photos of the crew.  I told my mom I had a "bodyguard" in Tj to make her feel better, so of course I had to have Omar pose as one.  It works, right?

 This is a great pic of the inside garden area of Florence Hospital.  It is a very nice hospital.

We went back to the hospital and Cecy met us and took me across the border.  She gave me a mango popsicle by Nestle (Frizz?).  I ate most of it, sooo good.  I traveled with a license and certified birth certificate- no passport cause I was born in the USA, I was born in the USA (what, no one else heard this song in there head??).  We crossed the border in 59 minutes with only a small lecture.  I was told a passcard is around $50 or an enhanced license is available in some states for border crossing only.  Back in the USA.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

My 2012 Goals

  • Fit in an airplane seat without sucking in for X hours without wearing spanx so the seat belt doesn't pop.  My next plane ride for work is in September.
  • Fit in all the rides at the amusement park without doing the walk of shame when my boobs or thighs are too big to get the harness on.  We are going to Universal early 2013. 
  • Be able to ride all the rides at the water park without being caught for being over the weight limit.  The limit is 400lbs per 2 riders usually.  I need to be under 230 to ride with my daughter or son.
  • Fit in a movie theatre chair without turning sideways to put half my ass in then the other half. Weekly thing.   Dang armrests.
  • For my weight and size not to start with a two.
  • For my underwear size not to be double digits.

I'm leaving on a jet plane....

In 5 days!!!  I am down to 287.2, which is 22.8lbs down  from the first of May and 16.8 lbs from when I set my surgery date and started the mushy diet.  Omar texted me yesterday to check on my pre-op diet which was nice.   I have found my favorite protein shake so far Oh Yeah Cookies n Cream.  It was nice and thin with 32 whopping grams of protein.  Muscle Milk chocolate is ok but it is so thick.  Health Valley apple blueberry fruit yogurt smoothies are yummy too.   

Honestly, I'm not nervous about the surgery.  I know the routine and I'm mentally prepared for that.   I'm nervous about having loose skin afterwards.  I have pretty tight clear skin now (except my belly) so I want it to stay that way.  I bought Jergens skin firming lotion and Palmers stretch mark lotion with collagen yesterday .  I walked about 4 miles this week in 3 days and I'm ready to start exercising without getting swollen ankles.  I also bought Tarjay brand calcium chews.  They taste like a tootsie roll.  I'm going to start packing my today.  I'd had a dream I got all the way to San Diego and forgot my birth certificate and cashier check.  Scary.

My favorite hobby is yard saling and yesterday I did awesome.  When I come up to a yard sale with someone my size I get all giddy because there is a chance I will find me some new clothes.  I bought me a few things in 18/20.  For .50 each, it's a small investment for my future body.  I have an entire closet full of 22 jeans and capris that I could never part with which will come in handy hopefully in the next couple months.  I wish I knew what size I'd be in by the end of the summer.  

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

10 days to go!

I'm down 13 pounds since I set my surgery date.  A co-worker measured me and I'm actually 5'5.5", so my current BMI is 47.8.  I am so ready to be done with this mushy food stage.  Today I've had a sugar free pudding, 2 Gogo Squeez applesauces, and the broth from chicken noodle soup.  I'm on my 2nd bottle of water.  I love the Mio drops, tastes like koolaid because I am so not a water drinker.  I got my certified birth certificate this morning, a travel toothbrush yesterday, and I'm ready to go!  I am so bitchy this week it's ridiculous.  I'm a stress eater, I get stressed, I pig out, I'm all good, repeat.  My daughter broke her foot at school Thursday, after 3 doctor visits and 2 pharmacies I had fried chicken on the brain.  I ate (drank?) a protein shake.  I haven't started exercising yet, but I am starting this week.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Doctor, Doctor Gimme the News

I'm so excited!  Dr. Kelly called me yesterday and waived the $500 fee for my BMI (50.6 vs 49).  He was very nice and answered all my questions and thoroughly went over my medical history.  Omar, his assistant, scheduled my surgery without a deposit since my loan isn't funded yet.  Prior to my surgery, I will get a cashier's check and scan it to Omar before bringing it with me.  I booked my flight immediately after and there is no looking back.  I was able to get a roundtrip non-stop flight to San Diego for $528.  I'll be flying in May 25th and having my surgery the same day.  I will be in the Florence Hospital Friday and Saturday night and the Hotel Lucerna Monday night and catch a flight back late Tuesday evening.  The price is all inclusive except for the flight, so my total out of pocket is $6,028.  Yesterday afternoon started my 2 week diet.  I bought skim milk, 100% juice, oatmeal, grits, lots of applesauce flavors, chicken broth, V8 soups, sugar free pudding, sugar free jello, and Activa yogurt.   My loan was 60% funded this morning and I'm finishing up my post to go make me some oatmeal.  Ready for the tummy growling to go away.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Getting Sleeved in Mexico

After 4 years of thinking about getting sleeved in Mexico, I'm going for it.  I could have been normal by now.  My debt to income ratio is low enough to get a personal loan.  By reading on a message board, I found out about .  I applied Friday and 5 days in I'm funded 46.67%.  My ID is Member_1512427 in case you decide to go that route.  I applied for $6000 and at a B4 credit rating, my interest is 13.11% for a 36 month loan.  The payments will be $202.xx the price of a used car.   It is peer to peer lending and individual investors contribute to the loan.  So far I have 56 investors!  I checked it out online and it appears to be totally legit.  I will be booking the doctor I choose as soon as my loan is deposited into my bank.

Airfare is $528 with US Airways nonstop from Charlotte to San Diego and back.  The shorter transit time the better so I'm considering this a fixed cost.  I've been in a plane 4 times for work and the flights have lasted a little over an hour.  I have a secret...shhh...lean in...I'm afraid to pee in a plane bathroom.  I don't want to get stuck.  The look so tiny on tv.  I guess with a 4 1/2 hour ride I will find out!

I have narrowed down my choice in doctors to 3- Almanza, Kelly, and Ponce De Leon-all in Tijuana.  90% of the people I've told are against me going to Mexico.  I don't think I'll be caught up in a drug war, get kidnapped, or any other horrible thing that no one I know has personally experienced.  I've been reading various message boards, ObesityHelp and VerticalSleeveTalk to read every review of my favorite doctor choices.  Kelly is my top choice.  He has tons of glowing reviews online, it sounds like he is very personable and  he doesn't do drains which hurt coming out-bonus.  My BMI is over 49% so I would be charged $500 additional for a total of $6,000 all inclusive except airfare.  Ponce De Leon has a great coordinator, Trish, and has positive reviews as well.  His cost is $5500 all inclusive except airfare and I can get a video of my surgery if done at INT.  Almanza seems to have the love 'em or hate 'em reviews online but has done the highest number of surgeries and is the lowest cost at $4999 plus airfare, 1 night in San Diego hotel, $20 x-ray, and 2 nights at a hotel if I don't want to stay at the recovery house.  It totals just under $5300.  Decisions, decisions.

Fat kid loves cake

I was always a big kid from about age 8.  When someone called me fat or made fun of me, I got them back.  I ate more.  My grandma used to hide her Little Debbie snack cakes from me and my cousin while she was at work.  It was our mission to hunt those babies down and devour  I was at around 180 pounds in 9th grade and my gym teacher pushed us hard.  We had PE every other week and most of the time we ran...then ran some more.  I could do a mile in about 11 minutes, whoop whoop.  I started eating only grapes, strawberries, cucumbers and vinegar, spinach or greens from a can and lost down to 145lbs.  I wore a comfortable 11 or a skin tight 9.  Remember those colored jeans in the mid 90s?  I wore a size 9 in those once lol.   That lasted about a year. 

When I was 16, I went to school, came home and scarfed down supper my grandma had made, then went to work.  We were a meat and potatoes household and I love me some homemade mashed potatoes dipped in fried cube steak.  I'm drooling thing about it.   The school lunch was horrible, so I would buy a slice of pizza, fries, and a gigantic chocolate chip cookie almost daily from the school canteen.  It was "low fat" b/c I wrapped the cheese around the fries and tossed the crust.  I worked fast food, so had access to chicken nuggets, apple pies, and other goodies before they were thrown out at night.  Guess what I worked?  I kept it at around 170-180lbs.  I was in JROTC and my grandma said my uniform kept getting tighter and tighter. 

When I met my current hubby, I was 20 and in an XL/16.  I had two kids both by c-section 15 months apart.  I gained 80 lbs with my daughter and lost most of it.  I ate healthy portions of meat and veggies and tons of fruit and water with her.  With my son I was tired.  I had a 6-mo old baby, I worked full time, and I was pregnant again.   My daily craving at work were a microwaved moon pie and a mountain dew.  Seriously, my coworkers had them on my desk every morning.  You want me to move your project in, oh you brought me lunch, ok top of the list!  I gained 60 lbs and kept all of it on.  I was given a prescription from my OBGYN, Meridia but the co-pay was $100 and the leaking side effects were not worth it.  I also joined LA Weight Loss but it didn't help either.  I was admonished for eating shrimp and chicken in the same meal like a 5 year old and I quit.  I kept it around maybe 240-250.

Two years ago my appendix ruptured.  After waking up on a Saturday morning, my cat walked on me and it felt like an elephant with claws so I went to the ER.  I had an abcess the size of a football and had surgery to remove it.  My gallbladder went bad at the same time, but I was too sick to have both removed.  I lost about 30 lbs and 3 months later had my gallbladder removed.  Recovery was very smooth with the gallbladder surgery, but I blew up like a balloon weight wise.  My stomach looks like the goodyear blimp that got attacked by Freddy Krueger.

That leads up to my current situation.  I hit the 3-0-0 mark.  My rolls have rolls.  I'm tired of being fat.  I work full-time but have no insurance and probably won't anytime soon.  I support 4 people and 2 cats and bought a new house last year.  When I stress I eat and I stay stressed all the time.  Last year for my daughter's birthday we went to Carowinds and I cannot fit my butt or chest into most of the awesome roller coasters.  This Saturday we are chaperoning a school field trip and I get to sit and watch.  It's embarassing for me and I know it is for my daughter.  She is my mini-me.  I also love waterparks and  last year had a season pass.  When me and one of my kids or sister would go down and it said 400lb limit I'd be thinking "don't even say thing to me" instead of thinking of having fun.  Starting this year, I want to have fun not fat.  Ok, one more confession.  All of my pics are ALWAYS taken chest up and I suck in all the time.  I also don't allow my glasses in photos.  You'll see that in my before-before photos.  What I post from now on is the real deal.  Just remember that when you OMG!